We’ve come to the conclusion recently that twenty-first century humans have become entirely too serioso. We just don’t laugh enough. What was once a quirky, avant garde indie film, Koyaanisqatsi has become a way of life. Too much bad news and fear-based commentary have made us feel guilty for enjoying ourselves. Sure, we pass along the occasional lame e-mail joke, but deep down what we really long for is an over-the-top, tears-down-the-face, snot-snorking, wet-your-pants kind of laugh fest. Now that would make us feel good. Not to mention we’d all like each other more and we’d get along better. We’d also be far more attractive and desirable. And there would be less war. Definitely less war. You can’t wage war and laugh at the same time.
Let’s face it, the alternate reality we inhabit for eight hours a day to earn our daily bread provides fertile ground for tales of the absurd. Some of us get paid to impersonate Colonel Sanders, wrangle toddlers, write parking tickets, or act in zombie movies. Others hand out free samples at Costco, teach driver’s ed, or stand on street corners dressed as giant tacos. Some are even proctologists.
The way we see it, we have two choices. Find the humor in what we do or spend our days stabbing ourselves in the leg with a letter opener.
So, we challenge you in 1,000 words or less to help make Planet Earth a funnier place. Share the workplace story that still makes you laugh out loud even years (or decades) later. Change the names to protect the guilty and give us your best shot. Make our day.
We’re so eager for a good laugh that we’ll give cash awards for the best three sagas: 1st Prize $200, 2nd Prize $100, 3rd Prize $50.
Our goal is to publish a trade paperback book of the best stories––that way you and everybody you know can join in the fun and read about other people’s crazy experiences. But we’ll need lots of well-written, dastardly funny tales in order to do that, so get your friends and coworkers to enter, too. (If we don’t receive enough good entries to produce a book, we’ll still award prizes for the three best stories.) As the title says, Daily Bread is about finding humor in the workplace. We’ll choose the stories we most enjoy, the ones that make us laugh ‘til our sides hurt. We’re looking for true-life tales about bizarre tasks, wacky work environments, and ludicrous predicaments you’ve gotten into while trying to earn a living.
All stories must be original (meaning never-before-published in any form, print, electronic, audio, or video). You must be the sole author and own all rights to the material. Make sure your story is no longer than 1,000 words and written in English. You may submit up to three stories; however, we won’t publish more than one story from an author. We reserve the right to edit stories for style, clarity, and maybe stuff most people would find really offensive. Entrants must be at least 18 years old. If we select your story and publish it, you’ll retain copyright and give us one-time anthology rights. Humor, as we all know, is a subjective thing. Our panel of judges will choose the stories that make them laugh hardest and longest; their decision is final.
How to Submit
Send a hardcopy of your story to us at PO Box 442, Ingram, TX 78025, postmarked no later than midnight June 1, 2010. Or, send e-mail submissions in Word, in a .doc format to email@example.com. Submissions should be double-spaced, pages numbered, with your contact information at the top of each page. Include a nonrefundable entry fee of $5 U.S. per story payable by check or money order (no cash please) to Laugh at Life Books, or submit electronically and pay with PayPal through LaughAtLifeBooks.blogspot.com. Provide your name, e-mail, snail-mail address, and phone number. (If you want to use a pseudonym, let us know.) If we select your story, we’ll notify you after the contest ends. Sorry, but we won’t be able to return any manuscripts or entry fees, so make sure to keep a copy of your work.
This competition is void where prohibited or restricted by law.
We’ll keep you updated here, but if you have questions our blog doesn’t answer, e-mail us at firstname.lastname@example.org